Drawing Feelings: Helping Kids Name Big Emotions

Drawing helps kids name big emotions because it gives feelings a shape before children have the words. A child who cannot say "I'm frustrated" can often draw a grumpy face, a storm cloud or a red scribble, and that drawing becomes the start of a conversation.

Young children feel everything big: joy, anger, jealousy, worry. What they often lack is vocabulary. Drawing bridges that gap. It is one reason school counselors and teachers keep paper and crayons close.

Why drawing feelings works

• It is indirect. Talking about a drawing feels safer than talking about yourself.
• It slows things down. Drawing takes a few minutes, which helps a big feeling settle.
• It makes feelings visible. Once a feeling is on paper, it can be looked at, named and talked about.

Grumpy is a great place to start

It sounds strange, but drawing grumpy faces is a fantastic way to talk about feelings. Kids find grumpiness funny, and laughing about a feeling makes it less overwhelming. How to Draw: Grumpy Faces is full of wonderfully cranky characters. Draw one together and ask: "What do you think made him grumpy? What would help him feel better?" Children often answer with their own story.

Feelings drawing activities

• Feelings faces. Draw happy, sad, angry, scared and surprised faces. Talk about what each looks like.
• Weather report. "If your feelings were weather today, what would they be?" Draw sunshine, rain, a storm or fog.
• Color my mood. Pick a color for each feeling and fill a page.
• Feelings monster. Draw a monster that shows how you feel right now.
• Before and after. Draw how you felt before something hard, and after.

How to talk about the drawing

Keep it gentle and curious:

• "Tell me about this face."
• "What is happening here?"
• "Has anyone ever felt like this?"

Avoid interpreting ("That looks angry, are you angry?") and let your child lead. Sometimes they will open up, and sometimes the drawing is enough on its own.

Build a feelings vocabulary

After drawing, offer a new word. Mad can also be frustrated, annoyed or furious. Sad can be disappointed, lonely or left out. Kids who have more feelings words are better at explaining what they need. For more on faces and emotions, read drawing faces teaches empathy.

When feelings are very big

Drawing is a lovely everyday tool, not therapy. If your child's feelings seem overwhelming for a long time, or drawings show repeated distressing themes, talk to your pediatrician, school counselor or a child therapist.

More in feelings and calm, or browse all 217 posts on the blog.